Band of Slugs

Fans Charged for Throwing Tyres at Bellamy

Moment of impact! A Car Tyre strikes Craig Bellamy

Greater Manchester Police have announced that a number of fans have been charged for throwing tyres at City forward Craig Bellamy.  Fans at Wednesday’s Manchester derby will remember the slightly comical scene of a section of fans throwing tyres at Manchester City striker Craig Bellamy.  The Welsh forward is frequently regarded as the most annoying man in Football, superseding the ever unpopular Robbie Savage.

The fans will appear in court today and will likely face a ban from football stadiums and a community service order expected to approach 100 hours.  Demonstrations have already began with many fans calling for a clause in the law to allow large objects to be thrown at Craig Bellamy.  Hal Jordan, founder of campaign group ‘Bellamy’s Fair Game’, said “What has this country become if we can’t even chuck a few tractor tyres at that [man], it’s time for a change in the law!”

Football has been trying to clean itself up in recent years and has largely succeeded but this latest incident could set the campaign back.  Bruce Wayne, a spokesman for the Football Association, said “We’ve been working really hard to prevent this sort of behaviour at games but it seems a few fans took no notice of our efforts and threw some car tyres at that chap with no neck. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not adverse to throwing large objects at Bellamy just not at a match.  Perhaps fans could wait till the game has finished and lob objects at him then.  Rotten vegetables would have been equally funny.”

A spokesman for Craig Bellamy said “Craig was fortunate that he is both very short and without what could be considered a normal neck.  Because of that most of the tyres flew over his head but a number of them hit the target.  I know more than most how much of an arrogant, petulant so-and-so he is but please could we stop with the car tyres.  Thank you.”